"Best New Restaurant"
Sunday, August 22, 2010 at 10:57AM It's Thursday night and I've got my usual seat in the sixth row. The drinks aren't great, but they're strong enough to get the job done. It helps being at a high altitude, and the first one is always free. The joint is rough, but is gradually taking steps in the right direction. Last week's entertainment was Miley Cyrus. This week is Queen Latifah. Slowly, and gradually.
As the lady in blue approaches, I feel a rumble downstairs. I'm hungry, but have never eaten here. The menu is nothing but boring sandwiches and uninspired wraps optionally accompanied with pedestrian cheese plates of cheddar, monterey and bleu. Could be a rough night.
I hear the lady in blue taking the order from the group in front of me, and note that they're out of red. I didn't think it was possible for Redwood Creek to run dry. Better not be any shortages of their tolerable stock.
My mind races between thoughts of cold turkey and the 'Chocolove' chocolate bar. In my panic I go exotic, and utter Thai Chicken Wrap. At least my waist line will thank me. The 'Thai sesame aioli mayo sauce' (with a hint of lemongrass) is served on the side. What does that even mean? The name is a bit redundant, and terrifying--I never trust orange stuff out of a tube.
Each tortilla wrapped bite is full of vegetatious crunch--suitable for any rabbit. The cold chicken sneaks in protein occasionally, but it's hard to find. I get the meal over with quickly to not drag out the pain, but my mouth is dry like a desert. The lady in blue rarely comes back for refills, and she gave me more ice than water in my short glass. Looks like there is still more crunching ahead of me.
I chokingly finish before the first act starts. Looking out the window I know I'm going to be stuck here for another three hours. Going to go with plan B, which actually happens more often than plan A. I put my headphones on, and close my eyes.
United in Food, Restaurant Review 
Reader Comments (5)
Awwwww. Airplane food makes me gag also. But Miley Cyrus? That's just cruel... ;-)
So pedestrian...
I don't even eat on planes anymore. I'd rather starve or just have more Bloody Marys. Plus, entertainment? Take a Kindle. Especially if the entertainment is Miley Cyrus.
If you go international there are Charlie Trotter specials that you can order, and specialty sushi if you're going East. The kindle is great for the longer flights--read the Millennium trilogy that way.
Ewww, last time I flew to AZ they served us turkey hot dogs, I passed, and waited for a yummy dinner in a southwestern place...saved the hot dog experience for the 'dogeuro' with salsa verde and bacon wrapped, now I would be down with that on the plane!